How to Remind Guests to RSVP

How to Remind Guests to RSVP for Your Upcoming Wedding

It’s a tale as old as time. You and your partner spend months, or even years preparing for your wedding, and you finally send out your wedding invitations to friends and family. You then eagerly anticipate messages that guests are in or out, either via your wedding website, digital wedding invitation, or through a physical RSVP card delivered back to you through the mail. 

In a perfect world, all of your guests reply “yes” or “no” by the due date given to them, but most of us know that’s never the case. There are always a few people you need to gently remind prior to your celebration. If you’re not quite sure how to remind guests to RSVP politely, there are a few tips and tricks from the Bliss & Bone team and other etiquette experts. Read on for more details about how to tackle this sometimes challenging situation, so you can look forward to your special day. 

So, How Do You Politely Ask Guests to RSVP?

This age-old question has been asked by the majority of wedding couples, and there are different strategies. Some guests might be waiting to figure out their schedules, but in most cases, your guests probably dropped the ball and forgot to complete this step. Below, our favorite preparations and methods to gently ask your loved ones if they’ll make it to your wedding day: 

• Wait until your RSVP deadline has passed. You should clearly state the time when your guests should RSVP, which is typically two to three weeks before the wedding day. As much as you’ll want to get ahead of this, you should wait until the deadline has come and gone before deciding how to remind guests to RSVP. Many of your guests might simply be procrastinating, and you don’t want to irritate them with a call or text before your requested due date. 
• Be prepared for a slightly awkward chat. It’s best to give your guests a call, and remember that it might feel a bit awkward or tense. Per the etiquette experts at EmilyPost.com, “One of the sad parts about the demise of the RSVP is that relationships often suffer due to hosts’ resultant hurt feelings and frustration. It is perfectly polite, however, for hosts to call friends to ask if they plan to attend.” If you’re in a bind, you can also draft an email or text to send over, but calling is always the most straightforward, clear way to handle this.
• Keep it simple. You don’t have to demand an explanation or make it more tense. Try to make your request clear and straightforward, and you can even write up a message you can recite over the phone.  
• Review your stationer’s options or recommendations. It’s possible that your stationer or the online stationery experts you work with will have other methods to contacting guests who have not yet responded. For instance, Bliss & Bone has two different ways to do this outreach, which we will explain in the following section.

While this is a frustrating, time-consuming task, determining how to remind guests to RSVP is necessary because you need an exact headcount for your wedding. Most vendors will want the number, and you don’t want to leave people without a seat or meal at the reception, but you also don’t want to overpay for extra people.

How to Remind Guests to RSVP with Bliss & Bone Products

If you decide to order your stationery through Bliss & Bone, you have two avenues that fulfill your questions about how to remind guests to RSVP: online wedding invitations or wedding website follow-ups. Here’s how both types of communication work for Bliss & Bone products: 

• How to Remind Guests to RSVP via Online Wedding Invitations: For online wedding invitations, there is a free "follow up" feature that allows you to check in with the guests who have not yet replied to the invitation. You can send out RSVP reminders, event updates, transportation details and more ahead of the big day. 
• How to Remind Guests to RSVP via RSVP Wedding Websites: Your wedding website is the digital extension of your stationery, and you have the opportunity to add a RSVP page with all of the necessary details. For wedding websites, the premium subscription offers unlimited email communications that allow you to follow up with guests. This makes your communication as easy as possible, and you can deliver any message you need to as the wedding day approaches. Other bonus features with the premium subscription include deleting, resetting and editing RSVPs. 

As you think about how to remind guests to RSVP for your special day, you should keep in mind that the RSVP experiences are quite different when you collect them from online wedding invitations versus wedding websites. The former is a more simplistic RSVP process, so you will only be able to ask guests if they will or won’t attend. By collecting all of the RSVPs through your wedding website, however, you can add other wedding related events (think a welcome party, rehearsal dinner or post-wedding brunch), ask guests specific questions about their dietary restrictions or meal preferences, inquire about their transportation or accommodation plans and more.

Now that you have a better understanding of how to remind guests to RSVP for your upcoming celebration, you should feel more empowered to have those sometimes awkward or challenging conversations. At the end of the day, you and your partner deserve to feel special and celebrated, and this is one task on the road to your one-of-a-kind wedding. Most of the time, these reminder calls can also serve as an excuse to call up your loved ones and check in on them. By reframing your mindset, you can go into these chats with more positivity and excitement. Chances are, your loved ones have a lot going on and they simply forgot to complete this step. Once this is out of the way, you can all look forward to enjoying time together during your wedding festivities.